Help! I haven’t any wild Viking spray!

Congratulations, Sarah Palin!  A (presumptive) female candidate for the second-highest office in this election; well, that’s absolutely great!  Yeah, sure, you’re no Hillary, but hey, no one as awesome as Hillary could stomach being John McCain’s right-hand (wo)man, anyway.  And you certainly are a woman, Miss Wasilla 1984.

So, um.  That’s a really nice picture we’ve got here, isn’t it, Sarah Barracuda?  I see that you’ll be rallying an entirely different constituent base in your bid for the Vice Presidency. That’s pretty neat. Must’ve been really exciting for McCain to discover you had such a pull with the aborigines.  An untargeted demographic indeed!  Although how significant is the costumed (or are they?) Viking contingent in the United States? Or the part-bear, part-human voter base? Oh, I get the appeal now!  It’s all about the boning, right?

Um.  Errr.  Whoops.  The Republicans absolutely do not mean it that way.  Silly Democrat.  Sex jokes are for kids!

Oh well. I’m sure McCain has some wonderful commentary on that, at any rate.

Now I just feel sorry for her.

No, wait.  No, I don’t.