Tagged with sarah palin

There’s always a first for everything.

Look, I know how buzz marketing works. While I am no expert, I completely get the basic tenets. Oh, sure, I also totally (claim to) understand SEM, too. And yes, I realize my latest three posts have been about Sarah Palin. Which means that I, too, am contributing to the epidemic that is Sarahmania. So it’s certainly not my place to curse it when I am just as guilty of causing it.

But can I just say one last (as far as you know) little thing?

My inability to cease obsessing over the Barracuda has now been officially documented for all to see. Um, yeah. My boss is totally gonna fill my plate with oversized helpings of juicy workyslop now! At least I’m not in it alone, I s’pose. Me and my paper trail, oh me, oh my. My mother always warned me about that, but did I heed her words? No, no, I did not.

But, like I see it, informing yourself is important. Crucial. Dire. Paramount, if you will. No matter when, where, how, or with whom it happens. And the more and more I read about Sarah Palin, the more critical it becomes that we make the right decision in November. Because if we screw it up this time, I’m not sure how many more chances this country will have left to rebound.

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A Day in the Life #2 – The Truth Really Is Stranger Than Fiction.

Separated at birth? Bueller?

Phew.  Hey, is this seat taken?  Pardon me, but I need to sit down.  You see,  I’m already knackered, and I haven’t even begun writing!  That’s because, well, it’s like this.

Listen closely, dear reader.

Because I’m going to tell you once, I’m going to tell you again, but you’re never, ever going to believe me. But it happened.  I swear on everything that is cheesy and good in this world that it did.

Ready?  Here goes.

Truthfully, it’s difficult to know exactly where to begin.  I mean, between the exhilarating and invigorating DNC and the how-many-peaceful-protesters-can-we-arrest RNC (mind-blowing they even have a website at all, considering McCain can’t use the Internet), the past week has been a flurry of excitement and adventure.  There was Sarah Palin and her baby mama drama.  Or was it the Pitbull-in-Lipstick‘s baby’s mama drama?  Dearie me.  I need a pizza.  I’m famished.

Can you believe we’re still talking politics?

Let’s not fool ourselves any longer.  Toto, we’re really not chewin’ the fat on the election anymore.  This is more like a telenovela, if you ask me.  Except in English, of course.  With uglier outfits.  And much, much earlier birthdates.  Ahem.

Shall we continue?

So, after everyone made fun of Sarah Palin and effectively discounted her second X chromosome, I-Wish-Dude-Wasn’t-A-Lady mocked Obama’s tenure in public service.  Oh yes she did, yo.  Girlfriend totally went there.  And then the newest Spears mama bought onesies for the Palins’ pregnant underager.  Because an affiliation with any member of the Spears family enhances your social standing these days, dontcha know.  But never fear; Lynne Spears pulled the plug on that dirty rumor.  Wouldn’t want to tarnish the Spears’ reputation or anything, would we?

As if that wasn’t enough, then there was, like, a hurricane, too!  I mean, not in Houston, but still, it happened.

Drug-induced hallucination?  Hunger-inspired delusion?  Figment of my imagination?

‘Fraid not, my friends.  I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.

And now back to your regularly-scheduled dose of the-truth-is-stranger-than-fiction reality.

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Help! I haven’t any wild Viking spray!

Congratulations, Sarah Palin!  A (presumptive) female candidate for the second-highest office in this election; well, that’s absolutely great!  Yeah, sure, you’re no Hillary, but hey, no one as awesome as Hillary could stomach being John McCain’s right-hand (wo)man, anyway.  And you certainly are a woman, Miss Wasilla 1984.

So, um.  That’s a really nice picture we’ve got here, isn’t it, Sarah Barracuda?  I see that you’ll be rallying an entirely different constituent base in your bid for the Vice Presidency. That’s pretty neat. Must’ve been really exciting for McCain to discover you had such a pull with the aborigines.  An untargeted demographic indeed!  Although how significant is the costumed (or are they?) Viking contingent in the United States? Or the part-bear, part-human voter base? Oh, I get the appeal now!  It’s all about the boning, right?

Um.  Errr.  Whoops.  The Republicans absolutely do not mean it that way.  Silly Democrat.  Sex jokes are for kids!

Oh well. I’m sure McCain has some wonderful commentary on that, at any rate.

Now I just feel sorry for her.

No, wait.  No, I don’t.

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